quick summary: willy wonka and the chocolate factory
boy: i hate being poor
grandpa: were going to the fun factory
mr chocolate: hello naughty children its murder time

herwhisperisthe-jyp:

i had a dream that i was walking around in a shirt with stalks of corn all over it and somebody was like “wtf are u wearing?” and i said “it’s a crop top” i laughed so hard that i woke up

reblog if your icon is a sex god from the high heavens

fricklefracklephan:

thecompanionsdoctor:

thecompanionsdoctor:

Whenever my friend says goodnight to me on Skype he sends me this gif

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and I wanted to send it to him tonight so I went to Google “black man turning off lamp” but Google autofill changed it to “black man turning into jet” and I got this

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Long story short it’s 1am and I’ve been laughing at this for approximately 20 years

Which one of you assholes brought this back

Every time i see this it hurts my tummy

hawkbye:

Ah you’re reading hawkeye? I love that comic. The way he just [clenches fist] eyes all those fricking hawks

meowvgonspengler:

1950S SLANG IS LIKE MY FAVORITE THING IT IS SO RIDICULOUS

LOOK AT

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WHAT IS THIS

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DUCK BU TT I AM LAUGHING

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RAZZ

MY 

BERRIES

toocooltobehipster:

when you hug your straight friend but he forgets to say no homo

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automatically:

walking a drunk friend like

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queerpotters:

sherlocksmyth:

I have a friend who is dyslexic and one time he said “I put the sexy into dyslexia” and he waited for like thirty seconds and just went “fuck.”

How to Know if They Like You by Myers Briggs

tabby-flenderson:

ENTP~ Prove themselves with arrogance and arguing
ENTJ~ Hyper critical
ENFP~ Can’t stop smiling more than usual
ENFJ~ They will act like perfection itself before you
ESTP~ Awkward
ESTJ~ Ultra listener and attentive
ESFP~ Make complete fools of themselves, in a cute way
ESFJ~ Brags
INTP~ Intense trolling
INTJ~ Stalkerish
INFP~ By the time you figure it out they like someone else
INFJ~ You don’t know and never will
ISTP~ Confronts you directly
ISTJ~ Ultra intense eye contact
ISFP~ *blushes
ISFJ~ Lots of little glances and smiles

ladybrienne:

joannalannister:

Game of Thrones s5 

I have so many questions and my first is WHAT THE FUCK

ladybrienne:

joannalannister:

Game of Thrones s5 

I have so many questions and my first is WHAT THE FUCK

reparrishcomics:

Hamlet - Act II, Scene 2

reparrishcomics:

Hamlet - Act II, Scene 2

softmikus:

yeah good grades are cool and all but have you ever had a good night sleep

finally finished my ftv draft. the word limit was 1,200. i wrote nearly double that. whoops.

dajo42:

"you have nice bone structure" can either mean "i find you aesthetically pleasing" or "you will be a strong warrior in the skeleton war"